The Blog

July 8th, 2008

Inspiring Women: Diane Abbott

I first came across Diane Abbott through watching Andrew Neil’s, “This Week” show on late night BBC television. Diane Abbott, labour MP for Hackney North and Stoke Newington appears with Michael Portillo, former conservative MP. Alongside Andrew Neil, they put the world to rights, tackling serious issues, often with a dry humour, as they recognise and try to find solutions for today’s problems. They are a breath of fresh air on the British political scene.

Diane Abbott became the first black woman MP in Britain back in 1987. She has always taken a strong stand on women’s issues and human rights. She has battled for longer sentences for gun crimes, the banning of imitation weapons and been involved in publicising a knife amnesty with Hazel Blears MP, to get knives off our streets. The underachievement in schools, particularly of black boys, leaves them vulnerable to follow a life of crime and violence. Diane has been involved with organising conferences in London and elsewhere to look at how to help black pupils achieve. Her work led to the “Aiming High: Raising the achievement of minority ethnic pupils” consultation document and this initiative raised the profile of the problems that this group of children face.

In 1992 she set up an organisation called Black Women Mean Business to encourage black women to succeed in business. This organisation now has approximately 500 members and works with other organisations to help improve diversity in the work place.

She is a strong supporter of the Reclaim the Night 2008 campaign which involves a women’s march in London on Saturday 22 November. The march is to stand up against rape and male violence in all its forms. This includes domestic abuse and crimes against women in forced marriages and sexual violence and harassment.

Diane Abbott is a shining example to women everywhere. She is proud to be a woman and whether or not you agree with what she is saying, you can tell that she is sincere and trying to make the world a fairer, safer and better place. She has natural charisma and tells it as she sees it. She is passionate about standing up for what she believes, defending human rights for everyone.

Her website has more about her achievements.

In this series of Inspiring Women, Diane Abbott shows that we can all make a difference by using the gifts we have and her talent is being able to make people listen.

Pictures from BBC News

July 7th, 2008

Need some Sizzling Beach Fodder? Tan Lines by JJ Salome

Are you looking for a sizzling summer read that will put you in the lives of the rich, famous, and dirty?  Look no farther than Tan Lines by JJ Salome.  This was one novel I simply couldn’t put down and as I neared the final chapters, I was hoping for just a few more Metro stops to delay me needing to get off the train!

Now, this is not your typical chick-lit and if you are looking for a novel that brings to mind the female bonding of girlfriends (like Sex and the City), this is not it.  Instead, we have a gritty novel that has you both cheering and jeering - the three main characters.    We meet three college friends that are approaching their 30’s. When it comes to analyzing their friendship, one of the gals comments that isn’t that they love each other, it’s that they are each the kind of women that other women hate - so they are left with each other.  They have agreed to share a house in the Hamptons for the summer - to recharge, bond, and try to fix the messes that are their lives.

First of all, there is Billie Shelton.  She’s an indie rock star whose life is only about the indulgence of her two habits:   drugs and men.  Thing is, where it worked for her in earlier years, it’s not exactly working now.  Her career is in the gutter, her relationships are falling apart, and she is self-destructing.  Can going pop salvage her career?  Can a conservative man be the ticket to finding herself?    We have the beautiful Kellyanne Downey that most women hate without speaking to first.  She’s achingly beautiful but has become nothing but a rich man’s mistress.  Can she get her acting career off the ground by participating in a reality program?  Will she ever step out of the mold as “whore” and become a person who is loved simply for herself, and not her skills in the bedroom?  And then we have Liza Pike.   Liza is a successful writer and political commentator known for being THE feminist.  Thing is, she did something very non-feminist by marrying a strong fireman in the wake of the 9/11 tragedy.  Her marriage is falling apart at the seams and in the wake of fear of this failure, her aging, and her taking a break from her career, she has begun to harvest her eggs.  She can be a good mommy - later.  Her outspokenness has garnered Liza a stalker.   Can Liza escape from her dead end marriage and find a man she loves?

The sex is hot, the relationships complex, and the twists and turns more twisted than you can imagine.  Life is not a fairy tale, and if you only read books with fairy tale endings, then this is not the book for you.  But if you want a book that will make you want to turn the next page instead of applying more sunscreen, then add Tan Lines to your list of “must read” summer books.   I like seeing the gritty side of life on occasion, so for me, it was a great addition to my purse - and I would recommend my friends take it with them to the pool.

Tan Lines by JJ Salome is from St. Martin’s Press on July 8th in your favorite bookstore (and you can find out more by visiting the official webpage)

By the way, take a moment to comment here and share what YOU think makes a great “beach read” and you’ll be entered into a drawing for a free copy of Tan Lines.  We have two copies to give away, so, don’t hesitate to dish.

July 4th, 2008

Book Review: The Eye of Jade by Diane Wei Liang

I didn’t choose this book because the Olympics Games are coming to China, it was a present to me from my lovely son and his family. It is a story of a young female detective, Mei Wang, seemingly searching for an ancient and valuable artefact.

Interwoven is Mei’s haunting family history, which as the tale unfolds, becomes the main focus. At times the writing seems a gentle insight into the life of modern China, with its warmth and its hypocrisy, but there are also more sinister windows into China’s history.

The story builds in interest and as it does the reader is drawn into complex questions of love and betrayal.

Diane Wei Lang, the author, was born in Beijing. She experienced a labour camp in her childhood and took part in the student protests in Tiananmen Square. This author is new to me but I found I was thinking about the book a couple of days after finishing it, so I’ll be looking out for her next one.

July 4th, 2008

United States Independence Day

If you live in the United States, you already know that today is Independence Day, a holiday that is always celebrated on July 4th.    For history buffs out there, you may remember that that date was chosen as this day because the Second Continental Congress adopted the unanimous Declaration of the thirteen united States of America (typically called the Declaration of Independence) on this date in the year 1776.  This document is considered the founding document of The United States of America.

Even today, 232 years later, the words penned by such great men as Thomas Jefferson, John Adams and Benjamin Franklin, are concepts that bear repeating on a regular basis: “We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness.“    The words there are more than simply words.  They are carefully crafted ideas and ideals, heartfelt principals that men and women (then and today) have given their lives for. Granted, we could argue that rights to all citizens are still lacking at times, but we cannot deny the greatness of minds that came together to found the Country that I call my home.

I have traveled in and out of Washington DC over the last three years and have spent  90% of my time the last few months living in the city.  I have visited the National Archives where one of the original copies of the Declaration of Independence resides and I would be lying if I didn’t tell you how I got goose bumps as I stood looking at the fragile piece of parchment underneath the glass….signed by the President of the Congress (John Hancock) as well as 55 other brave men.  Just this past weekend, I visited the Library of Congress where Thomas Jefferson’s working draft of the document was on display along with many of the books and papers that influenced some of the ideas contained there.

The 4th of July is not just about barbecues and pool parties, it is so much more.    It is a celebration in the price brave souls have paid in order to grant the freedoms that most folks take for granted.  I look at at like this:  you may not agree with everything this Country does, but you are blessed with the freedom to give your opinions by these founding fathers, rebels, who stood up to say that we have certain unalienable rights.

July 3rd, 2008

Movie Review: Sex and the City

Oh ladies, wasn’t it fabulous? The end of May saw women from all over the world reaching for a Cosmo and gathering their gal pals as our favourite girls from New York graced the Big Screen for a long over-due catch-up. Yup, I’m referring to the premiere of Sex and the City – one of the most anticipated movies of 2008.

By now, chances are you’ve already seen the movie, which got me to thinking, Carrie-style …Is there really any point in writing a review when every woman on the planet has already seen the movie? But let’s face it – chatting about SATC is almost as much fun as watching it. So please, indulge me if you will. Besides, it’s such a great movie it’s worth a bit of a waffle…

So, the last time we saw the girls was back in 2004. Miranda had recently married Steve and Charlotte (together with baldy hubby Harry) were about to adopt a Chinese baby. Samantha was beating breast cancer with the support of the gorgeous, gorgeous Smith (yes, he is gorgeous) while Carrie left her Russian ‘lova’ to return to the Big Apple with our boy, Mr. Big. I’ll never forget watching that final episode on the telly as the show ended with Candi Staton’s You got the Love (great song) and Carrie’s voice-over where she says “Later that day I got to thinking about relationships. There are those that open you up to something new and exotic, those that are old and familiar, those that bring up lots of questions, those that bring you somewhere unexpected, those that bring you far from where you started, and those that bring you back. But the most exciting, challenging and significant relationship of all is the one you have with yourself. And if you can find someone to love the you you love, well, that’s just fabulous!” (Oh yeah, the waterworks were flowing on that one.) And with that, the chapter closed on six years of laughter, tears and moments that made even the most hardcore of us blush.

Sex and the City: The Movie catches up with the girls four years later. A little older, a little wiser – though still fabulous – each character has undergone a natural progression. Charlotte is the doting mom of a beautiful little girl. Miranda is as busy as ever, juggling the various roles she fills (sadly, at the expense of her sex life). Samantha has moved to LA to promote Smith’s career and Carrie is deeply, happily in love with Big – as he is with her. Sound too good to be true? Well, yeah.

One fabulous penthouse apartment and a marriage proposal later, Carrie finds herself moments away from marrying Big, when things go horribly pear-shaped. (Don’t fret, my pets – I haven’t given anything away that the trailer doesn’t. A lot more follows…) From there we are taken on a roller-coaster ride as the ladies deal with infidelity, fear, ageing, the process of healing… you know, life stuff. All, of course, with a healthy dose of SATC humour.

The extremely fabulous wardrobe doesn’t disappoint either. All the big names are unashamedly out on show. ChaneI, Prada, Valentino, Dior, Vivienne Westwood… yeah, baby. And that’s to name but a few. No doubt about it, stylist Patricia Field certainly lived up to her well-deserved reputation! As for Carrie’s Vogue shoot… stunning!

Another thing that makes this movie special is its soundtrack – it’s really good! The OST boasts a range of goodies that include the theme song (gone ‘big band’), Duffy’s Mercy and the fabulous Fergie, not to mention gems by Jem (sorry, couldn’t resist that pun) and The Bird & The Bee. But the two tracks that I love the most are All Dressed in Love by songbird Jennifer Hudson (who plays Carrie’s personal assistant, Louise ‘from St Louis’) and India.Arie’s The Heart of the Matter. Simply beautiful. So check out the soundtrack – it’s definitely worth a listen.

Anyway, back to the movie. I’m such a huge fan of the TV series and the movie, but even I have to admit I doubt it’ll be cleaning up at the award ceremonies. And I can’t help but feel that the 22 minute episodes are a little “punchier” than the feature film. All the same, it’s a really good, fun movie that’s best watched with the girls and then followed by a round (or two…) of cocktails. And any movie that encourages women to celebrate their inner “fabulousness” scores high in my books! So if you haven’t seen it yet, stop what you’re doing, right now – and head for your nearest cinema. And if you’ve already seen it, well why not watch it again!

July 2nd, 2008

Office Drama

Office Bullies.  I hear everyone has to deal with them sooner or later.  Well, it seems my time has come and I have my very own, shiny, new office bully!  I don’t know whether to frame her and hang her on the wall, or maybe shove her in a closet and try to forget about her.  I am not a very aggressive person.  I don’t like confrontation and I don’t understand people who do.  But this lady lives and breathes drama.  She apparently picks a “victim” to pick on and peck at and generally harass until she gets bored and moves on to the next person.  Thanks to my age (I’m 26 and she’s in her 40’s) it appears I’m her next lucky victim.

So who else here has to deal with an office bully?  Feel free to share any tips, tricks, or stories, because I could use the inspiration!

July 2nd, 2008

Inspiring Women: Dame Tanni Grey-Thompson

Dame Tanni Grey-Thompson was born with spina bifida and has been in a wheelchair since the age of seven. She is one of the world’s most respected sportswomen and is considered Britain’s greatest ever Paralympian. Dame Tanni started her sporting career in 1984 representing Wales in the Junior National Games. She has since won 16 Paralympic medals, including 11 golds, the London Marathon 6 times between 1997-2002 and held over 30 world records. She is indeed a force to be reckoned with. In 2000 she was appointed an OBE for services to sport.

Photos from BBC

To me, Dame Tanni is a great inspiration for her perseverance and hard work, and not allowing how others view you to impact how you view yourself. No doubt there were naysayers when she first mentioned her dream to win a gold medal, and now she proudly owns 11 of them. Far too often we let our own disabilities - whether physical, emotional or mental - stand in our way of reaching for our own dreams. We allow ourselves excuses so we don’t have to try. Dame Tanni didn’t and she continues to be an inspiration to all athletes.

Since her retirement from the track, Dame Grey-Thompson has been a presenter for shows on BBC1 and BBC Wales. She continues to play an important role in sports and in 2006 was elected to the Laureus World Sports Academy. She is a wife and mother, as well as the author of Aim High and Seize the Day. I think her book titles say it all for me and why I find Dame Tanni Grey-Thompson so inspiring.

This post is part of our new Inspiring Women series.  Each week we will focus our attention on inspiring, and amazing, women who are doing extraordinary things. From women entrepreneurs and world leaders, to single moms and activists. If you have a recommendation for a woman who you think is inspiring and deserves some attention, let us know.

July 1st, 2008

Canada Day

While those of us in the United States are looking forward to the upcoming three-day weekend we get for Independence Day on July 4th, today is an important day of note for Canada, and I wanted to take a moment to wish our Canadian readers and contributors a Happy Canada Day!

What’s Canada Day?

It’s not quite the same as the “Independence Day” other countries celebrate throughout the year. Instead, it makes the anniversary of July 1, 1867 when the British colonies of Nova Scotia, New Brunswick, and the Province of Canada (which in the process was divided into Quebec and Ontario) into a federation.

While it is generally regarded that Canada became a kingdom in its own right on that date, the British Parliament kept limited rights of political control over the new country, though they were gradually shed - the last of them ending in 1982 with the Constitution Act, which patriated the Canadian Constitution.

While July 1 does not, then, mark a clear-cut independence day, it’s still referred to as “Canada’s birthday” in the press.

Happy Canada Day!

July 1st, 2008

From the Editor: Welcome to Spice of Life (July/August 2008)

It was poet William Cowper who said “Variety is the very spice of life, that gives it all its flavor.”   We here at All Things Girl are strong believers in that whole train of thought and are pleased to bring to you the fourth issue of 2008:  Spice of Life.

As you scroll through the virtual pages of All Things Girl and our July/August issue, I hope you are able to appreciate the glimpses into the lives of others.  Each month, we grow to be more amazing than the month before.   First, our classics and representative of our theme: Writings & Arts. In Writings…. you will find short stories that make you smile and poems that make you feel whimsical.  I know you’ll recognize some names here in Writings….and will be thrilled at the discovery of some new talent as well. And what can I say about Arts? Art is downright fun this issue as we get a glimpse into the spice of life.   Everything Girl is, as always, wonderful.  You will find  an interview with our lovely cover girl, Francia Raisia as well as our Man of the Moment, Crosby Loggins.  In addition to wise words and thought-provoking ideas from our regular columsinsts, there is also an inspiring interview with author Breena Clarke. Be sure an grab a glass of ice tea or lemonade when you sit down to read Everything Girl! And let’s not forget Reviews. You’ll find music reviews and book reviews.

As always, keep an eye on The Blog. You never know what you might find as the editors and columnists share what’s on their minds…..as well as a chance to win several books.

We’re still taking submissions for “Spice of Life” by the way, but you need to be quick. We’ll have a mid-issue update August 1st and will be adding a few items here and there… If you are inspired to share your talents, submissions are open for future editions of All Things Girl – and we can’t wait to see what you’ve got!

Believing in the concept of the Spice of Life is a wonderful thing.  What I hope for you is that not only do you embrace the concept, but you are also out there living it.  Much love to everyone.

June 30th, 2008

Lost in a Good Book

During the weekend that just ended, I found myself nursing a very sore right arm (too much computing), not in the mood for television, and soothed by a lovely rainstorm outside my window. I had a stack of novels waiting to be read for review, and I curled up on the couch with the dogs, and was soon immersed in one of them.

I was taken back to all the times in my life that entering a book has literally been stepping outside of time for a while. I don’t often have the opportunity to dive so deeply into my reading that the rest of existence truly disappears and it’s just me and the story. To do so, Saturday night, was more refreshing than any spa treatment. (And I am the queen of spa treatments, so I should know.)

As I write this, night has settled around my house, my husband is stuck at work on a project that may take until dawn, and I have a rare few hours without anything pressing to do. I could - and probably should write, but somehow, there’s nothing more appealing than picking up another novel, and getting lost in a good book.

June 30th, 2008

Live Alone and Like It The Classic Guide for the Single Woman

“But you will soon find that independence, more truthfully than virtue, is its own reward. It gives you a grand feeling. Standing on your own feet is extraordinarily exhilarating...”

Those are not the words at the end of a Sex and the City episode, but a quote from the book Live Alone and Like It by Marjorie Hillis. This lovely little pink book, sized just right for dropping into any designer clutch, gives not advice as well as case studies for all aspects of living alone. It’s smart, chic, funny and gives the kind of advice you would expect to find in a Carrie Bradshaw column. You will likely be surprised to know that the book was written in 1936 by Marjorie Hillis who was a Vogue Editor and an example of the growing number of women who lived alone by choice.

Though we often long for romance in our lives, which Hillis acknowledges in Chapters such as “When a Lady Needs a Friend”, many women are choosing to have a career and live alone by choice, not by chance.  Hillis provides practical advice on subjects such as dressing fashionably, handling your finances smartly, and simply enjoying life.   She advocates all kinds of ideals you probably thought were modern on subjects like sex, friendships, and liquor.  It’s a fabulous little read and would make a great gift for a recent college grad, recently divorced or widowed girlfriend, or any woman that wants a bit of a road map to navigating the life of a single woman out in the world.

Dying to check out all the wonderful advice?  You can win your very own copy.  How, you may ask?  Just simply comment here in the All Things Girl blog.  A drawing of all commenter will be held at the end of July.

June 29th, 2008

Books for Soldiers

Samara’s recent blog post reminded me of a wonderful charity I stumbled upon recently: www.booksforsoldiers.com.  According to their website, Booksforsoldiers.com is a nonprofit organization dedicated to supporting those in the US military who are deployed outside the US. Military personnel are invited to make requests, and members read the requests and fill them. Booksforsoldiers.com receives no government support, and limited corporate support. It is made possible due to the generosity of its members.

In fact as I read more I learned that they are desperately low on support and are currently conducting a major fund-raising drive just to continue.

So if you’re like me, drowning in books, dvd’s, and other entertainment gadgets that seem to multiple like mice, then consider passing them on to our troops!

June 28th, 2008

Contest to win designer handbags with author Felicia Sullivan

Author Felicia Sullivan of The Sky Isn’t Visible from Here is having a fantastic contest and I had to share! We’ve interviewed Felicia in our Sacrifice issue, and I am a shameless fan of hers. She is not only a fabulous writer, and wonderful friend, but she has excellent taste in fashion. If I could just spend a day with her in NYC and a credit card (without a worry about paying it off for the rest of my life of course), I know I could become acceptably fashionable, rather than my current look of “i-haven’t-grown-beyond-the-college-look” or “i-work-from-home-and-it-shows”.

To enter the contest and be up for winning a lovely Valentino handbag, an Etro shoulderbag or a set of 20 new titles, visit her site for details.

June 27th, 2008

Caring for Those Who Would Be Our Protectors

It is no secret that I do not approve of the war in Iraq. The financial devastation that it has caused both countries pales in comparison to the loss in lives. Our young men and women, many not even old enough to legally buy beer or wine in this country, have given their lives at an alarming rate with very little to show for it.

However, all of this aside, what I find to be truly disturbing is the poor treatment that these men and women receive once they return stateside. Most return with life-shattering wounds like missing limbs. I saw one soldier that appeared to be missing half of his skull.

Yet, far more of our soldiers bear wounds that are unseen. Deep within the recesses of their hearts and minds. Mental and emotional scars that prevent them from experiencing even the smallest of joys, like the smiles of their children or the embrace of the spouse from which they have long been separated.

We are returning these men and women to their families as empty shells. Leaving them with very little in the way of financial or psychological services. One soldier started a group to bring attention to the number of disabled veterans returning. He chastised the media exacerbating the problem by only focusing attention on those lost in combat.

There is the matter of the skyrocketing suicide rate among active soldiers in Iraq and Afghanistan, and those that have recently returned. These men and women have given 100% of themselves to their country. It is evident that the support that they are getting isn’t enough. They need proactive, practical assistance to deal with the horrors of war.

Last night I discovered that many active soldiers are receiving yet another slap in the face: They are losing their homes to predatory lending while they are away at war. There are currently no measures in place to prevent foreclosure, only to delay it.

No matter how you feel about the war itself, this is no way to treat the brave men and women that have volunteered to be our protectors.

June 26th, 2008

It’s Just Hair

My oldest daughter is sporting purple hair right now.  Not a deep wine you might find on me as the days become shorter and fall bleeds into winter, but a neon purple that can only be worn by someone that’s incredibly artistic.  It wasn’t a total surprise to me when she excitedly told me her hair was “rad” and bright purple.  I had made the appointment and given the salon my credit card number.  I had expected a violet-red color as the result.   Instead, she (and the colorist) found a way to make a bit of a bolder statement.   Then again, aren’t bolder statements part of what makes life interesting?

Then, the other night,  just as I was about to walk into a restaurant for dinner, my cell phone rang.  It was my ex husband.  “Do you realize HER hair is purple?“.    Thus began a conversation which led to a heated discussion, which soon led to comments such as “waste of money” and “sign of letting her run wild”.

She’s almost 17 and it’s summer.  She doesn’t have a job and will be applying for jobs later this summer - and then prepping for a mentor program for next year.  School dress codes requires that students have a “naturally occurring hair color” so any explorations in the world of funky hair should be done during the short time between now and August 15th. She’s an artistic kid, talented in both art and in writing. She understands that when she goes job-hunting, the hair will go back to something a little more appropriate for the workplace.

I look at it like this:  it’s just hair.   At her age, it’s part rebellion and part expression.  She knew it would irritate her very conservative father, and I’m sure it’s one of the reasons she chose such a bold color.  It’s also an expression of creativity that isn’t permanent, like a tattoo.  I don’t see that it’s worth getting bent out of shape about - and I certainly don’t see that it’s a sign of running wild.  I’ve long been a believer that if you make a big deal out of every little thing, then the really important discussions about subjects like sex, drug use, safe driving habits, etc won’t take place or sink in.  Why?  Because if a teenager (who thinks they know everything) gets a lecture on every little thing, they get in the habit of tuning you out on everything.

Feel free to let me know you agree - or disagree with me.   I’ll continue to pick my battles on some issues….and live with purple hair for a few weeks.

June 24th, 2008

Inspiring Women: Miriam Wanjiku Ndungu

In times of crisis some people show remarkable bravery, compassion and generosity. They put themselves at risk to help others in need. These are the amazing people that renew my belief that perhaps humankind has a spark of hope in amongst all the other madness. One such amazing woman is Miriam Wanjiku Ndungu who sheltered some 80 people in her small 2 bedroom house during an outbreak of violence in Kenya that left 1,500 dead and many injured and homeless. Miriam’s story is one of great courage, self-sacrifice and kindness. In the video, James Mburu Muiruri, talks about having to flee his town and how he and his family, found shelter with Miriam.

Photo by Kate Holt - www.kateholt.com

There are so many horror stories that filter out of Africa that it is sometimes far too easy to overlook the acts of individuals who epitomise goodness. Sadly, the violence has continued in Kenya with terrible acts of torture and assault on citizens. It seems most of Africa is in some sort of upheaval right now, and it breaks my heart.

As a new blog feature, I’d like to take some time each week to focus our attention on inspiring, and amazing, women who are doing extraordinary things. From women entrepreneurs and world leaders, to single moms and activists. If you have a recommendation for a woman who you think is inspiring (perhaps she juggles a job and 3 kids, or maybe she started a non-profit or runs a highly successful business) and deserves some attention, let us know.