Everything Girl

A few weeks ago, I had the opportunity to see Gloria Steinem in person at my alma mater, Salem College, which is also the oldest female academy and college in the United States. After I returned home, and with every intention of completing this article, life went berserk.

My 17 year old daughter, who has little understood Epileptic Seizure Disorder of the frontal lobe, went into the hospital. We survived this, as well as unmentionable issues with my youngest daughter AKA ‘Babe Mobile Denter.’ Then, my Yorkie (female) puppy in training ate my second pair of glasses. This evidently was not fulfilling because she also ate papers and notes I took, pens, pencils, crayons, my bedspread, the carpet, and exposed wood corners of furniture legs. As if this wasn’t enough, she ate the cord to my memory disc jump drive.

When she proceeded to devour two of Gloria Steinem’s books I left sitting on her favorite chair in my bedroom, bits of once firm book boards were reduced to speckles of dust.

I told her this was a definite no-no and she kissed me. I accepted my puppy’s apology because I was obviously not paying attention, so it was my fault too.

Besides, I still could write my story, after all I did have my memory. Gloria Steinem, one of the foremost activists on women’s issues, is my hero and has been since the first Ms Magazine I read and then submitted work to.

Steinem taught me that the letter ‘R’ meant – Rejection. I subsequently went to Salem College and wrote my first English paper on a story Steinem wrote - Sex, Lies, and Advertising where I learned that ‘R’ also meant Revision. I like this meaning better and it seems fitting to apply revision to the word feminism, which is the word that best describes “the longest revolution” and is an on-going battle to achieve true equality of the sexes.

If it is true that women comprise more than half the world’s population, including work force, then why are we still not equal? Steinem offers, “Jobs are still valued by the doer, and not by the value of the job.” Ironically, in America, as in many countries, the feminization of poverty and the masculinization of wealth is still the status quo.

“Ironically, in America, as in many countries, the feminization of poverty and the masculinization of wealth is still the status quo.”

Take being a homemaker who is most often female. Then add to this a homemaker’s dual role, because she often must take a job just to help support the family’s income.

But what if, a homemaker could receive a tax break, even though she earns no income from being a caregiver, housekeeper, cook, chauffeur, nurse - you know - the whole gamut that most women unless they are rich and famous, must do in order to raise a family.

The key is in placing a dollar amount on the services a homemaker performs. Can we do this is not a question, but rather would a government anywhere support this? Doubtless as it may seem, there is still an undercurrent of reform that posits this opportunity somewhere in the far off future.

However, this isn’t the only truth behind the fact why women are still going through the longest revolution.

One unfortunate hurdle for women is that most of the powers that be prefer for a female to have a male presence attached to her name.

Even though I was given a loan based on my business proposal, my husband’s name was put on the building I used to secure the loan, but not the loan itself. The business loan only comes in my name and the tax bill on the building, his name. I resent this because the answer the city gave me – “if you are married, we always put the husbands name first, we don’t care that the loan is in your name.”

When I was down-sized prior to this, my former boss told me that I shouldn’t feel sorry for myself, after all I had a husband to support me. Poor CK had a wife who didn’t work and two kids. It didn’t matter that I had a husband and two kids to support.

This is why I am now a recovered corporate executive, though I still have many hurdles in my new life.

I used to be a second wave feminist and only discovered after going back to college that a new third wave feminism slipped into the picture. This new generation of feminists in theory, want women to be seen as intelligent and political beings; judged for their minds and for what they achieve. However, their focus is on gender roles, race, social class, politics and sexuality. There is nothing wrong with this, second wave feminists blazed the trail and was for the same issues, but the third wave tends to downplay the feminist label because of the hold-over connotations and bad press that played upon second wave feminism.

Steinem responds to this intersectionality between the second and third waves by stating, “In my experience we come from the same territory but come on different paths - - - we need to honor each other’s different experiences and then find the commonalities.”

Considering how long it took women to obtain the right to vote, Steinem points out that there is still a long ways to go. Statistics are not encouraging:

• 1 in 4 women are victims of violence yet only ¼ of crimes against women are reported to authorities and 60% of female homicide victims are an intimate partner with the killer.
• From 1980 to 2006, the number of women inmates in state and federal prisons nationwide increased by 400%, double the amount of men.
• Women in government office from local, state, federal, and even other countries have made inroads, but fail substantially. The average is 16% in the US, and far worse in other countries.
• Five states have never sent a women to congress; Delaware, Iowa, Mississippi, New Hampshire and Vermont.
• Women need and use more health care than men do, but lack insurance that covers their needs and have more problems paying for care.
• Funds continue to be cut for student loans, Medicaid, child support enforcement, and educational and training programs that help women move to higher-paying jobs.
• Women are especially dependent on Social Security’s guaranteed, lifetime benefits.
• Single mothers in the workforce have low wages and little support, and many single mothers and their children live in poverty.

There is so much more and the disparity is not just in the US, but painfully worse worldwide. Some women can’t even vote and are considered chattels.

Perhaps the politically correct term for feminism should be gender equality, even human equality. The bottom line is that there is a long road to go. Some arguments by people who don’t understand what the basis for feminism is, suggest that the problems women face are illusory, constructed by the media, and have no reliable evidence.

The evidence is there. Somehow, and someway, women need to have access to and monitor the facts, figures, and data - that is - what is happening to women world-wide. The information will be enlightening and as Gloria Steinem puts it, “The truth will set you free, but first of all, piss you off.”

Bev Hamel is a recovered corporate executive and now owns and operates an antique shop in the tiny Historic and National Landmark town of Bethania, North Carolina. She lives above the shop with her husband, two girls, three cats, a Scottish Terrier, and Yorkie Puppy in training. The shop is actually a front for her writing and teaching endeavors. She is a freelance writer and has published short stories, creative nonfiction, essays, poetry, local newspaper articles and was editor for an area women’s magazine. Bev has just completed her MFA at Goddard College and her first fiction novel Daughter of the Seven Fires and is busily working on 2nd, 3rd, and 4th.

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