Everything Girl

Interviewer: So, Bev, how was your day?

Bev: I want to run away from home.

Interviewer: Why?

Bev: The truth is right now, I wish I were dead.

Interviewer: Why?

Bev: Because in the sight of many unknown people, I carried on like a banshee, wailed and cried, and said words even I didn’t know I knew.

Interviewer: Why?

“Because in the sight of many unknown people, I carried on like a banshee, wailed and cried, and said words even I didn’t know I knew.”

Bev: After deplaning earlier this afternoon and meeting my family who I sorely missed, we picked up my checked bag that miraculously met us as we walked down the escalator at Greensboro PTI Airport.

Interviewer: Why?

Bev: Contrary to the urgent emails sent to all those who happened to be in my AOL address book that said I was in Nigeria visiting the Tinapa opening ceremony, was robbed at gun point, desperately needed $1,380 so I could settle the hotel bills, I just came back from Goddard College in Vermont where I received an MFA (Master’s of Fine Arts) – in writing no less.

Interviewer: Why?

Bev: So I can now write stories about why I want to run away from home, be dead, and become a highly paid writer and pay the repair bills.

Interviewer: Why?

Bev: When I saw that, my new Babemobile, a gorgeous Black Honda Element with all the bells and whistles had a gaping hole and a (sigh) concave dent in the back left side where my taillight should have been. (Not to mention the gaping hole in my neighbor’s fence and the telltale signs of red plastic, which they don’t know about yet).

Interviewer: Why?

Bev: Because my sixteen-year-old daughter told a friend, “My mom will never know.”

Interviewer: What?

Bev: Because she said, “Dad never locked mom’s car and the keys are still in it.”

Interviewer: Why?

Bev: Because he is ten years older than I am and I think borderline senile.

Interviewer: Why?

Bev: Because we are caretakers of two teenage girls.

Interviewer: Thank you Bev. That explains everything.

Bev: Why?

Interviewer: You did say it was a Babemobile.

Bev: Dah . . . .

Bev Hamel is a recovered corporate executive and now owns and operates an antique shop in the tiny Historic and National Landmark town of Bethania, North Carolina. She lives above the shop with her husband, two girls, three cats, a Scottish Terrier, and Yorkie Puppy in training. The shop is actually a front for her writing and teaching endeavors. She is a freelance writer and has published short stories, creative nonfiction, essays, poetry, local newspaper articles and was editor for an area women’s magazine. Bev has just completed her MFA at Goddard College and her first fiction novel Daughter of the Seven Fires and is busily working on 2nd, 3rd, and 4th.

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